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What makes me grateful?

Sr. Susan Kidd, CND

What makes me grateful, and how does my gratitude look and feel?

It began early one Sunday morning, with an email announcing great news. Nothing like an email “proclaiming the release of captives” to get a day going on the right foot. I cried. Tears of joy? Oh I hope so. Tears of sorrow? Had I not prayed enough, believed enough? Every time I saw the news clips on tv and the computer, alone and in a group, I cried. When I was with others, I noticed my tears were not the only ones in the room. Other were crying too. It was such a personal response and an emotional time, I did not ask which tears they were shedding. I only knew my own mix. And I named it “gratitude”.

The following day, Gratitude became a litany of women, dead and living. A teacher, a leader, a mentor, a guide, a 97 year old I never even met (“We must keep up our hope.”) I am so blessed to be surrounded with such great witnesses of hope, of perseverance and I am grateful.

Then schedules resume, previous commitments take over. Did I forget my gratitude? Leave it to the Holy Spirit and 2 days with 2 students in 2 different settings to remind me. Accompanying groups is gift and I remembered my gratitude. CNDs have accompanied people since Saint Marguerite Bourgeoys first gathered women and men, young and old, in New France over 360 years ago. I am part of that lineage that is much bigger than I realize. Yes, crisis moments remind me of how big (and how small) we really are. Ordinary time rolls in again, like a fog. Recently, it is young people who help me lift the fog and see God. Their questions, their desires and longings call me forth. And truly, I am Grateful!

Sometimes the tears return. And in other moments, I am aware of the litany of women offering me comfort. Keep me faithful O God. Help me remember. And most importantly, let my gratitude be your witness.

What makes me grateful, and how does my gratitude look and feel?

 

Susan Kidd, CND

Thursday, June 19, 2014

 

 

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